When You've Lost Your Job: Finding Your Way Through the Dark

Losing your job, especially around Christmas, can feel like the world is crumbling beneath your feet. The depression, the uncertainty, the endless questions about where the next opportunity will come from – it's all completely valid and you're not alone in feeling this way.

This question was answered by Martine Beaumont, founder and CEO of Select Wellness and Select Counsellors with over 30 years of experience as a psychotherapist and executive coach, alongside Olivia Gatt, Creative Director at Scooter and award-winning creative leader, and Andy Wright, founder of Never Not Creative. The discussion was hosted by Andy Wright during a Never Not Creative session.

Acknowledge How Hard This Really Is

The first step is recognising just how difficult this situation truly is. As Martine explains: "You've really got to have a plan and fight back against the potential sort of negative toxic spiral." This isn't about putting on a brave face or pretending everything's fine – it's about being honest with yourself about the challenge you're facing.

Olivia shares her own experience: "My self-worth is connected to my career and my creativity. So it was a real hit... in that moment, it felt like the world was crumbling." These feelings are completely normal and acknowledging them is the first step towards managing them.

Watch Your Thoughts and Conversations

Your brain has a natural negative bias, and during unemployment, it's easy to get stuck in a downward spiral. Martine suggests monitoring what percentage of your conversations focus on problems versus positive aspects of your life. "The brain does have a natural negative bias, you know, it's like teflon. It just slips down there."

It's crucial to remind yourself that this situation is temporary. As Martine puts it: "You're just one day away from getting a job and then this will all fade... life is a long time. You're not going to be unemployed for your whole life."

Turn Job Hunting Into a Project

Andy recommends treating your job search like a structured project: "Get this out. It's almost... actually kind of like new business." Create lists of people you want to meet, track your progress through different stages, and focus on the elements you can control.

Olivia found this approach particularly helpful: "After every conversation that I had, I felt closer to a new opportunity... I felt reinvigorated and confident in myself because I was meeting with people that were like, 'You've got this.'"

Don't Go It Alone

Isolation will only make things harder. Olivia emphasises the importance of community: "There was quite a few other people in my situation as well. So, I felt like I had like a bit of a team of people we could like catch up and just like be be each other's support."

Reach out to your network, not just for job opportunities but for emotional support. As Andy notes: "The more you try and tackle this on your own the harder it will get."

Use This Time for Growth

While it might not feel like it now, this challenging period can become a time of significant personal development. Olivia reflects: "Doing something really hard made me learn more about me... that experience was a massive growth period for me... I felt like I came out of it with with a different sense of resilience and strength."

Consider taking free online courses in areas you're passionate about. This not only shows potential employers that you're actively developing yourself but can reignite your enthusiasm and give you something positive to discuss in interviews.

Focus on Self-Care

During this stressful time, it's essential to up your self-care routine. Watch your thoughts, talk to people who reflect a positive view of you, and don't suppress your anxiety – acknowledging and processing these feelings is healthier than pretending they don't exist.

Remember, as Martine wisely points out, you're often "so busy that we don't get to sit with ourselves." This difficult time, while unwanted, can offer an opportunity to get to know yourself better and build resilience you didn't know you had.

You're not the first person to face redundancy, and you won't be the last. This feels overwhelming right now, but it will pass, and you'll emerge stronger on the other side.

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